Saturday, October 31, 2009

When will they have a line????



Will they have a Fall Line? Spring Line? A line every year? Next Year? I know you are anxiously awaiting to see that "special flyer" that says "Rush and/or Informational.

Trying to figure out when the chapter is going to have intake can be exhausting, and stressful. There is NO way you will ever know if and when the chapter will be having a membership intake process. In some cases, some chapter will host MIP only during spring, or fall, or I have also seen it where they decided not have a line at all for that particular time. And I have seen cases where a chapter that typically have a fall line, for many many years, decided to change it up and have a spring line. Having a "line" (as people call them) really depends on the chapter, if they receive approval from the chapter's advisor, regional director, etc. There is a lot of "behind the scenes" that has to take place before the chapter can even decide to have a membership intake process.

I know many people try to follow the whole " well, they normally have a line during the odd years, or even years, or only in the fall , or spring." My advice? Don't follow these trends, because you never know,,,,the chapter just might switch it up a bit.

Ciao!

Letter of Recommendation.... Part II




I have been receiving a lot of emails about how and/or who to ask for a letter of recommendation, so I decided to post a blog about "Letter of Reccomendation Part II"

As I stated before, this letter should be from a financial member of the organization that knows you well enough to speak about your personality, character, and can express their opinions on how you will be a great asset to the organization. I would advise that you NEVER ask someone you barely know, to write you a letter of recommendation. Not only will that person NOT write you one, but you may get your feelings hurt by even asking them.

Also, asking an old friend that you haven't spoken to in a while, or barely spoken to is also not a good option as well. I have experience both ends of the spectrum. I received quite of few females, who have followed me on my blog, or I have answered a question or two that they posted on yahooanswers ask me to write them a letter of recommendation. This is NOT a good thing. I will not write a letter of rec for anyone I do NOT know. Now do I have to meet you in person to know you? NO! There are some girls that I have established a relationship with over the net, and if they asked me to write them one, then I would possibly think about it.

Okay WHEN should you ask for letter? AFTER RUSH! Do NOT ask for a letter way before hand....Most chapters will say that they need for the person to DATE the letter, so trying to over-prepare and get a letter of rec before you even attend the rush is NOT a good idea. I will however suggest that you ask the person beforehand IF they will write you a letter of recommendation when the time comes. But asking them to write you one now, and you haven't even attended a rush, is not a good option.

What will the person include in the letter? Well that's really up to the person and the chapter. A Letter of recommendation for joining a sorority is the same as applying for college, or grad school. By that I mean, when you receive the letter of recommendation, in MOST cases they organization will ask that you provide the letter in a SEALED envelope with the person's signature written across the back of the letter. So I say that to say this, make sure you ask someone that you are not only comfortable with, but someone who will praise you throughout the letter.

I had a situation where a very close friend of mine asked me for a LOR....I haven't spoken to her in a long time other than a text for my birthday. I declined writing her a letter because we haven't truly spoken to each other in years, and I really didn't feel comfortable writing her one, since we have lost touch with one another and I couldn't really comment on her personality, and/character.

I hold my organization very near and dear to my heart, and it takes a VERY special person for me to write them a letter of recommendation. There was another case where a girl really wanted to be a delta ALL for the wrong reasons....It's like she planned her whole schooling simply around pledging the organization. Although I LOVED and admired the love she had for Delta, I felt that she wanted to be a delta all for the wrong reasons. She often talked about stepping, oo-ooping, strolling/strutting, wearing the letters, etc....Sure Delta does all of that, ,and I will oo-oop in a min, but that is NOT what Delta is all about. When she asked me for a letter of recommendation, I simply asked her why she wanted to be a delta. I did NOT like her answer and told her that I could not write her a LOR because she is joining for the wrong reasons. She became angry with me, and told me that she thought of all people she thought I would understand how BAD she wanted this because she recalled how I wanted to be one as well. In the long run, she ended up finding another soror to write her a letter of recommendation, and just as I thought, she was only active for 2 years. She complains about the dues being so high, yet she rocks the latest and hottest designers in a second. She says she doesn't have time to go to the meetings, and to our community service events, yet she is the first person there and the last person to leave at a step show, or a Greek party. Case in point? I was right on the $$ even though I truly wished I was wrong. She was what we call a T-Shirt wearer (I will go into detail about this on another blog)

So I say that to say this,,,,When asking a person to write you a LOR, do not take offense if they decline. It is THEIR choice if they want to write you a LOR or not. If they decline, then keeps it moving until you find someone who will write you a glowing letter. Besides wouldn't you prefer them to decline in writing you a letter of recommendation, oppose them writing you one, sealing it up only to find out that their letter was NOT what you expected? (For example, we had one girl who brought in her sealed LOR and the soror wrote in her letter to NOT accept her in the sisterhood...I was in pure shock when I read that, but she gave some valid reasons)

Case in point; be careful and mindful who you ask to write you a letter of recommendation.

Cia for now!

Friday, October 16, 2009

Alpha Chapter of DST Presents Proselsyte Day 2007 AND 2009!!!




So I decided to take a break from my blog and post something that is near and dear to my heart....Delta Sigma Theta Sorority Inc. This is SO beautiful and each time I view this, it reminds me of why I decided to become a member of this illustrious Organization. So I wanted to share it with all of you especially since some of my followers are either sorors, or prospective members. This is the Proselyte Show that Alpha Chapter hosts each year on the campus of Howard University. This is a clever way to introduce new students (incoming freshmen and transfer students) to DST. Simply BEAUTIFUL. I will include both the 2007 and 2009 links. I am sure you will appreciate them just as I have.


Enjoy!!!!

http://www.collinsmetu.com/hudst/2007

http://www.collinsmetu.com/hudst/2009

Proper Email Etiquette



Since I am very active on yahoo answers and since starting this blog, I have received tons and tons of emails from people who are either interested in joining my beloved organization, or other Greek organizations. With that being said, I felt the need to address proper "email etiquette." Many of my sorors and other Greek members have told me that I have been too nice, and too forthcoming with information regarding joining Greek organizations. Although I value their opinions, I am glad that I can help people that may have questions regarding Greek life. Since I started answering questions, I have seen prospective members cross over and become my sorors, sister greet, frat brothers, and brother Greeks.

Okay now to the topic at hand. When you send someone an email that you do NOT know, it is important to have PROPER email etiquette. I have allowed this to slide for so long, overlooking the fact that the person who emails me did NOT introduce themselves, and jumps straight into the question(s) at hand. When you email me, another soror, Greek person, or anyone for that matter that you do NOT know, it is always proper etiquette first to introduce yourself, and THEN ask the question(s) at hand.

Oh yes, and PLEASE do not send an email in all caps! Not only does it mean that you are shouting at the person you are sending the email to, it's hard on the eyes to read.

And that is ALL I will say about that!

Stay blessed everyone!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

I'm Not Black,,,Can I still join a Black Greek Org????



I decided to write about non-African-Americans that have desires of joining African-American Sororities/Fraternities. Now sure I will say that ALL organizations state that they do NOT discriminate against race. I will also however say that ALL votes are confidential, AND FINAL!

Everyone has their own opinion about non-blacks joining traditionally Black Greek Organizations. I remember reading an article in Ebony about this issues a few years back. The people in the article stated how they get love from some of their members, however other members snub them simply because they are not Black. Some feel that race should NOT be an issue, and we as members should only focus on their credentials and qualifications. I agree with this 100% Others feel that they should join their own orgs since there are plenty of Whites, Latina/o, Asians, etc.. orgs out there where they will feel more "comfortable hanging around their own kind." I remember there was this one girl, she was Mexican that wanted sooooo desperately to join a Black Sorority. She had a banging GPA (3.9) tons of community service, she attended all of their events, was president of various organizations etc. She tried THREE times and still was not chosen. She secretly told me that she felt it was her race, and that this particular chapter would never pick her because she was not Black. She never knew that I KNEW personally that she was right. I had friends in this chapter and they told me the day they pick a non-black person to join is the day hell will freeze over.

So we were having A Greek only event, and this discussion came up. One particular sorority stated that their chapter will NEVER choose someone who is non-black. Some of my very own sorors agreed. I was shocked by this. Think of all of the headaches we went through to get accepted to become a part of organizations that would NOT accept us purely because of the color of our skin. Aren't we hypocrites to deny someone else based on their color? Their arguments were "Well that's precisely whey WE created our own because they would not let us join" Well that may be true to some point, but that was clearly YEARS ago...*Hellooooo, Alpha Phi Alpha just celebrated 103 years* and it's not fair to punish those who had NOTHING to do with the ignorance of how we as Blacks were treated WAY back then.

Okay sure there are plenty of organizations out there for people to join that represents their race, BUT I feel if a person is interested in joining a traditionally Black Organization, then obviously they feel that this particular organization is better for them.

My advice to all of you out there that want to join, FIGHT FOR IT. I have a lot of sorors who are NOT Black, and I know plenty of non-blacks in other Black Greek orgs as well. Will everyone be accepting towards you? NO! I have seen people not give a non-black person a hug, the dap, or embrace the simply because of the color of their skin. To me, this just shows their ignorance, and I can't tolerate ignorant people. Just know that there are tons of people out there that will embrace you.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

I didn't get picked....Now what do I do????




Devastated, heartbroken, confused, angry. These are a few choice of words that can explain how you feel at this point. You just got the letter that you were hoping for...It states, "Thank you for your interests in XYZ org, but at this time we have decided....blah, blah, blah..You stare at the letter, and you heart breaks instantly. You can't understand it, your GPA was well above requirement, you had this "vibe" that the members liked you, you felt your letter of intent was perfect. You find yourself asking, "What did I do wrong? Why was I not picked?"

You will never know why you were not chosen just because everyone's vote is confidential. And truth be told if you did not receive majority vote then you will not be receiving a letter of acceptance. I have seen some rejected members snub the orgs members, talk bad about them, and simply choose an entirely different organization to join.

Just because you received that dreadful rejection letter in the mail, does NOT mean the end of the world. As I stated before, there are many members of organizations that did NOT make it on the first, second and third try. If this organization is worth fighting for, then FIGHT FOR IT!!!! Continue your community service, joining other organizations on campus, focusing on your GPA. I am sure the tears will fall, but pick you up, dust yourself off, and move on. Harsh words I know but there is nothing you can do if you did NOT get the required votes for membership.

This is why it is IMPERATIVE that you make sure your packet it T-I-G-H-T. There are hundreds of girls/guys that want a spot, so when you look at your packet does it stand out? Do you have a lot of leadership roles, community service hours? Is your GPA well above a 3.0? Were you confident at your interview? Did you take the time to get to know the members of the organization so they felt comfortable and confident in voting for you?

This can be the case when trying out for Alumnae/Grad chapter. This is because instead of going against other college students, you are going against Doctors, Lawyers, Judges, Chemists, Professors, etc...So you need to do whatever it takes to make sure your packet stands out!

If you know a member of the chapter, then I don't see anything wrong with pulling them aside asking them advice on what they feel you should do differently the next time. Once again I would ONLY recommend this if you know that person personally.

When the new line is introduced to the campus (undergrad) or community (alum/grad) then I would congratulate them, and wish them well. I have seen so many cases where BITTER, ANGRY, prospective members talk bad about the neophytes. Here is a bit of advice, they did not and DO NOT control who gets picked. I have heard it all from "how did she make it, my GPA is higher than hers, or he is a nobody on campus, etc...Remember that talking bad about these "members" will only hurt you in the long run, ESPECIALLY if you still desperately want to become a member. Case in point, these new members NOW have the voting power for the next line, so keep that in mind.

Not getting chosen on the first try is NOT the end of the world. If you are not a Senior, and you are attempting to go through MIP at the undergrad level, then you have a chance of working again if they have another rush before you graduate. If you were not picked at the grad/alumnae level, then you can always try again when they have another Rush. I know this can be disheartening because most alumnae/grad chapters do not have MIP that often. With that being said, use this time to get to know the members of the chapter you just submitted your application for, continue to volunteer your services, and try again.


I have seen many members who were rejected from the organization of their choice and FINALLY cross those sands a year, or in some cases years later. So just because you were NOT picked on the first try does not mean you will NEVER get chosen. Keep at it, and eventually you will find yourself appreciating your journey even more, because of the long hard road it took for you get there.

Ciao for now!!!!

I'm a Legacy....so I have nothing to worry about!!!!




What is a Legacy? A Legacy is a person whose mother, grandmother, is a member of the sorority she wants to join, or who's father, grandfather is a member of the fraternity he wants to become a member of.

What's the deal behind being a legacy? Is it helpful? Hurtful? Does it guarantee you a spot in the organization of your choice?   Sometime it's helpful, and other times it does not matter. I would highly suggest that you do your research. There are some organizations out there that have a legacy, where there is a place that you can put that on your application. Alpha Kappa Alpha, has an application for legacies that can be found here:

http://www.aka1908.com/pdf/undergrad_legacy_app_5_07.pdf

For this organization, however, your mother/grandmother/stepmother being a member of AKA is not enough, according to their website, they must have a living family member must have been active for at least two (2) years immediately preceding the membership. Other organizations have guidelines behind legacy status as well. I have a few friends who according to them, became AKAs due to their legacy status. They were proud of that it, and I was happy for them. Becoming a member of these organizations is hard enough, so if the organization of your choice has a legacy clause giving you extra "bonus points" in becoming a member, I say go for it! More power to a ya! As far as Delta is a concern we do NOT have a legacy clause for membership. If your mother/grandmother is an active and financial member of DST, then you will have to apply and go through the same steps that other prospective members have to go through who do not have a family member in that particular organization. For some of my sorors, this is a bitter pill to swallow since there have been cases where their daughters did NOT make line. Some find being a legacy a problem because at several colleges and universities, they have a cap of how many people can be accepted into membership. If the organization have a legacy clause, then it becomes harder for prospects who are not legacy. For example, XYZ university has a cap of 50 members. 40 prospective members are legacy members. That would mean that there are only 10 spots left.

Some prospective members feel since their father/mother/grandfather/grandmother etc. is a member, and then they are a "shoe in" for that organization. That is NOT the case. None of my family members were Deltas when I went through MIP and even if they were, if I had the option, I would choose NOT to use their membership status to gain membership into the organization. I would have preferred to become a member through my merit! If you decide rely on your legacy status then I say go for it. No one will shame you for it, and it's really no one's business other than you, and the organization that you are trying to become a member of. 

In conclusion, unless that particular organization has a certain set of rules about legacy, I would NOT rely on the fact that your family member is a member to guarantee you a spot! Instead, I would use them to ask question surrounding the organization about the rush, interview, and any advice they can give you about becoming a member. My personal feelings about legacy? There is nothing wrong with being a legacy. If I had a daughter, I would hope she would follow my footsteps and become a member of my organization. I would hope to prepare her enough that she will be able to one day, share the other half of her mid, with my mid.