Saturday, December 27, 2014

Sorority Sisters.........


So there's this show......on VH1.....called Sorority Sisters.   A lot of people asked me if I heard of the show. YES! Have I seen the Show? YES! Do I support the show? Uh, NO!

When I first heard about this show it was last summer....actually, let me rewind, it was further than that. I remember when there was a casting call for women who were members of the Divine Nine. I must admit that my curiosity got the best of me. When I found it Mona Scott-Young was behind it, I  knew it was going to be a ghetto hot mess. I actually thought there is no way in the world, an ACTIVE-FINANCIAL member of any sorority would be a part of this. BOY WAS I WRONG. When the trailer was released last summer, the Divine Nine members came a blazin! Someone created a petition, and in a matter of days, over 40k signatures (mine's included) was collected.

Mona went as far as trying to bring her cast to AGP (Atlanta Greek Picnic) but the organizers shut her down. The next thing I knew, the trailer was pulled from the internet, and it seemed as if sorority sisters would not see the light of day. YES! I was happy, people in geekdom was happy and all was well with the world.

Then about three weeks ago, it appeared again.  This time, a longer trailer was released. This time they had a premier date. When I watched the trailer I was mortified! Deltas' arguing with other Deltas. AKAs and Deltas arguing, cussing each other out and not getting along, etc. This isn't what SISTERHOOD is about. This show is NOT a representation of what GreekLife is about. If it was, TRUST ME, I would NOT have became a member of ANY sorority.

I watched the first episode so I could judge for MYSELF how it would be. I was hoping for the best, but I was wrong.  I couldn't even watch the entire episode, so I flipped the channel.  (I hate I gave them 10 or so mins of my time) A few mins later a soror on FB invited me to an event on Facebook  "Do NOT watch Sorority Sisters, and I invited every soror and Greek on my page to join. Although I did not watch the entire episode,  according to my Facebook feed, the show was just as bad as  LAHHNY and LAHHATL. I cringed because they didn't even TRY to disguise that these women were members of these organizations. I heard that they wore the colors, did their hand signs, did the call, and the at every time they did a confessional, their name appeared at the bottom of the screen, they made a point to state the FULL NAME of their Greek letter organization.  I was mortified, confused, angry, and embarrassed. What made this worse, is most of these women were in their early 30's late 40s. Just a few of them were in their late 20's. WHO ACTS like this at this age????? WHO? It was embarrassing on so many levels.

Mona Scott-Young and VH1 made a mockery of these organizations that was founded on scholarship, SISTERHOOD, and service.

The only thing this ghetto of a hot-mess show did was unite the BGLOs even closer together. Since VH1 did not hear us, (They came out with a statement that they will not be shutting the show down) then we decided to boycott the advertisers who advertised during the show. Our efforts have worked so far. To date we have 41 advertisers who have promised not to air their commercials during Sorority Sisters. I had tons of people inboxing me, and tweeting me about my opinion of the show. I told them NOT TO WATCH, and expressed my concerns about how it was not a good look for greek life in general.   We may not be able to shut the show down THIS season, but I am hoping that this will be the LAST season they will have sorority sisters.

So do me a favor, please let's all stand together (rather if you are Greek or not) and BOYCOTT Sorority Sisters.

Sunday, December 14, 2014

Fall Break-Spring Foward.....




Happy Holidays Everyone!

Wishing all of you that are enrolled either in a college and university many blessings and safe travels (for those who attend school outside of their hometown). This time of year always makes me excited! I will NEVER forget when I was anxiously awaiting my FINAL grades because I wanted to make a huge impression on the Delta Chapter at my School. My grades FINALLY came in on December 23rd, and my GPA was a 3.8. It's funny because I was jumping up and down in our living room, and my mom was like "Chile what is wrong with you?" I told her that I aced last semester, and she was proud!

After coming off of my high of having a 3.8 GPA (the minimal requirement for joining the sorority was a 2.5. However, I wanted to go over and BEYOND the minimum requirement) I started to get very nervous and all of the what ifs started to set it.

What if they don't like me?
What if they feel like they don't know me?
What if my overall 3.8 isn't good enough?
What if I can't overcome my shyness?
What if I don't get granted an interview?
What if I get stumped on an interviewing question?
What if? What if? What if?

I had a wonderful Christmas that year, spending half of it with my family in Chicago, and the other half with my then boyfriend, now husband's family.  My husband and her sister JUST pledge Alpha Phi Alpha and Alpha Kappa Alpha the year before, and they were trying to give me a few tips on how to stand out when I returned to school.

I started to make a journal share my thoughts on how I was feeling, as well as write down the advice that I was given from my sister-n-law. I wanted to get in contact with my ex's sister since she gave such excellent advice and was a Delta, but felt it would be too weird since the break up with her brother, and I was horrible. At any rate, writing down my feelings in my journal was exhilarating. Now and then from time to time, I go back and read my thoughts and get a real laugh at how I was nervous for NOTHING! I wrote down possible questions of what I THOUGHT they would ask me, like Why do you want to be Delta, what could you bring to Delta, Why should we pick you for membership, etc. Now, of course, I had no idea if they would ask these questions or not, so I was just "Guessing" and preparing myself. I just figured since people have always said to treat it like a job interview, I rolled with that.

All of those "What Ifs" that I asked myself was very helpful in the end. I realized that I had to be me! I had to be the person that God created me to be, and if that wasn't good enough for them, then I will just try again the following year.

So my advice to you during this "STRESSFUL TIME"??? Enjoy your winter break. You have worked SO hard this semester, studying hard, getting good grades, and performing and serving your community. (At least that what you SHOULD have been doing) And NOW???? The fall semester is behind you, and the Spring Semester is upon you in a few weeks. During this time, the only thing I asked for Christmas was $$$$ Something I had NEVER asked before. However, I knew that joining Delta was going to be an EXPENSIVE task......Although I had already saved up quite a bit of money from my job, I wanted to be safe than sorry. I started browsing the internet, looking at cute Delta Paraphernalia and bookmarking some internet sites of things that caught my eye. Now I had no idea if I would ever get a chance actually to PURCHASE these items because as I stated before, the chapter where I attended was VERY PICKY on who they picked for membership.

So enjoy your holidays with your family. Although me telling you not to stress is pointless, start preparing yourself to have a great and successful semester. Happy Holidays to you all!



Monday, November 17, 2014

Tips On How to Get Over Being Shy......



If I had a nickel for every email, comment, question that I have received surrounding this topic....... Look. I will be frank; I have been there. SHY! VERY SHY! I will never forget when my husband first approached me. He was trying to "holla" and I guess I was too shy and naïve to even notice. (Well that and I just got out of a bad relationship, and the LAST thing on my mind was trying to date). I have always been that shy person since I was little. In elementary school, I was never noticed because I was too shy to be seen. I just went to school, came home did my homework and went to bed. Most of my friends during my elementary school years were my friends at church and All-City Youth Chorus in Chicago. For some reason, I have never been the type of person that just would go up to a random person and start chatting. I am more of an introvert. I was like that my ENTIRE elementary school year until I entered the talent show. I performed and won first place. Then everyone started to talk to me as if they just met me for the first time.

High School was the same. I was shy, to myself, and allowed very few people in my circle. No one knew I existed then either until the end of freshman year when I entered the talent show. Once again I won FIRST PLACE, which was quite an accomplishment considering that I went to a performing arts school in Chicago.  For some reason, my shyness goes away when I am on stage. I am like in an entirely different world. I remember reading how both Michael Jackson and Beyoncé felt that way. And I understood exactly what they were saying....THAT.WAS.ME.

When I decided, I wanted to become a member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority Inc. I knew I had to get over my shyness. I had to make a point to allow the member to get to know me. THE REAL ME. But that meant stepping out of my box, and allowing STRANGERS in. That was SO hard for me. I had trust issues, and I realized I had to let that go. I had to walk up to people and speak, say hello, and spark conversations. I realized this would be my ONLY chance for them to get to know me.

So here are a few steps that can help you get over your shyness.

Keep your eyes on the prize. If you want to join any of these organizations, keep telling yourself that you have to overcome this fear to conquer your goal. It will not only help you with joining these groups, but it will be a life lesson as well. Take a deep breath.
Remember that once upon a time, they were in your shoes. Sometimes prospective members are blinded by those THREE beautiful letters written across the chest, arm, or back of a jacket of a member. They feel those letters are powerful. Only the best of the best gets to wear those letters. And while that may be true depending on who you ask, they were once in your shoes as well. I am sure they can all relate to how you feel about wanting to be a part of the org SO BAD you can taste it.

Listen to some inspiration music often which can be helpful sometimes to give you confidence. My oldest brother uses to listen to Chariots of Fire, or the Theme from Rocky. For me, my tune was "Survivor" by Destiny's Child or any upbeat Gospel song. 
Give GREAT eye contact to whomever you are speaking to. Give people the respect when you are talking to them. Don't look down on the floor, or up at the ceiling. It will show a sign-up weakness or disrespect, and you don't want to come off that way.

Speak with CONFIDENCE! Even though you are DYING inside, don't ever let them see your sweat. Trust me I have been there. I remember going to an event, and I felt SO intimidated because all the members were there, dressed to the nine. There were over 100 girls there, and I didn't want to get lost in the crowd. So when I spoke, I spoke up with confidence, sincerity, and I felt my words had substance.

WALK with confidence. You NEVER KNOW who is watching you, so you need to carry yourself like you have all the trust in the world. Now there is a difference between confidence and arrogance. Members in these orgs, want to pass the torch down to potential leaders, people that will bring their chapter to new heights. Make them believe that YOU are that person.  

In closing, the last thing you want to happen is for an opportunity to pass away because you were too shy. Then you will be sitting in your dorm room, or house/apt asking that DREADFUL QUESTION....WHAT IF?????? Don't be that "What If" person. If I were that person, I would not be where I am in life today. Happily married to the man of my dreams who I decided to give a chance after that bad relationship, enjoying life as a teacher, doctoral student, performer, and a beautiful family.

Ciao For Now!

V Love

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Switch?????? WHAT?????



So I even though I have addressed this in my blog already, I have noticed that I am still receiving questions surrounding this topic.

Dear V,

I was interested in joining Organization "A". I love "A" and everything they stand for. I had my heart set on pledging "A" until I went to school this fall. I found out A was not on campus. My heart was broken. I wanted to spend my year getting to know the members of A., So I decided to see if there was an alumnae chapter in the area. To my surprise, there was an active chapter in the area. I attended all of their events; I was able to get to know the members of the chapter, and connect with them. It was at the point where they new my name if they saw me at the neighborhood grocery store, or mall. I felt good about my decision of getting to know them.

I was told that they would not be having intake no time soon since they are on a moratorium. My heart was broken. Why did this have to happen this year of all years? Although I continued to support the alumnae events, I knew that it would not happen for me this year. My roommate, however, was interesting in joining org B. She asked me to accompanied her to a few events, and I decided to support her. In doing so, my eyes have opened to another org. I liked this ladies, and they seemed very nice. Now I am confused. What should I do? Organization A, you have to be a sophomore to join, but Organization B, you only have to be a second-semester freshman. Should I give Organization B a chance? Thanks!

Signed XXX


My ex-boyfriend wanted to be an Alpha. He wanted to be one BAD! I will NEVER forget the time we both went over his cousin's crib,  (Who was ALSO an Alpha) and he gave him the Alpha History book for him to read and study to prepare him for pledging.  (I was MAD jealous, why couldn't anyone give me the Delta History Book???)  Then his BEST FRIEND pledge Omega and he were actually considering joining Omega Psi Phi. This was I believe the only argument that we had at this point. You want to join WHAT???? First off, as much as I love the bruhs. (A term that is used for Q's ONLY in the Midwest until I learned later that Men in fraternities in the South use this......) I was dumbfounded. I told him he only wanted to be a Q because his best friend just pledged Omega Psi Phi. I said he needed to STICK with his original choice. We got into a quarrel one evening and during one of our double dates with my best friend and her boyfriend at the time, I asked her for her advice. She sided with me of course. She said you couldn't pull any stunt like that at my school, (She went to Howard)

I am not sure if he ever became a member of Omega Psi Phi or if he went back to his original plan and became a member of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity  Inc, or just decided not to pledge anything at all.  When I told my husband this story, he laughed and said that the poor boy was probably confused. Naw, I doubt he was confused, because all we use to talk about was me becoming a Delta, and him becoming an Alpha. He went on to say that he hoped he doesn't pledge his frat, or ANY frat for that matter until he made up his mind. He stated that We don't need people joining the fraternity if they weren't sure.  He went on say that  I just wanted him to become an Alpha because I love me some Alpha Men. LOL!  He's probably RIGHT!

 Believe it or not, this happens QUITE OFTEN.  I have seen it happen to some of my friends, associates, etc. In reading this young lady's post, it appears that she is trying to find to an organization to belong to. As I stated before, I have wanted to be a Delta since I was 14 years old. Never ONCE did I stray from that. Now, I am not saying that it's wrong to change your mind; it's not! My Aunt is a PROUD member of Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority Inc, and I have told you all that I have a family FULL of Zetas. One of my cousins pledged Zeta because it was the "thing to do " in my family. Right when it was time to cross, she dropped. She couldn't do it. She knew that AKA was in her heart, and if she singed her name on the dotted line, it would be the end of her journey. She would NEVER be considered for joining the sorority of her dreams. So the night she was supposed to cross, she dropped a line. Nevertheless, our family members were not happy about her decision. (This was in '84 or 85 I believe)

At any rate, 20 years later, she joined the sorority of her dreams. She had NO regrets and was thankful that she decided to drop a line. Look, I have said this so many times in my blog, membership in this organization is a LIFETIME! You do not want to end up pledging one fraternity/or sorority while secretly wishing you joined the one you wanted to be a member of.

These days, I am have seen my share of "Switching" that is AMAZING TO ME! You pledge one sorority or fraternity in COLLEGE, and then years later, on the other end of the globe, you pledge a DIFFERENT sorority or fraternity at the alumni/alumnae .....  I have asked myself TONS of questions on how this is possible? What happens when you go back to your school? Are you respected by your FIRST choice?  What about your line brothers/sisters? Do you just "throw away" those memories you had when you crossed with your LS/Lbs? Do you get rid of your pictures? What about the images that other people have of you? What if they decide to TAG you on Facebook? Or feature YOU as a Throwback Thursday on Facebook/Twitter, and they are you are.... throwing up your fraternities/sorority hand sign, How do they feel about that decision? And the questions goes on....and on...and on...... Sure you may THINK that they respect you,, but trust me...they are talking about you like a DAWG behind your back. This is ESPECIALLY the case if the org you decided to pledge later one HAD an ACTIVE chapter when you were in school and didn't pledge that chapter for WHATEVER REASON. Although this is none of my business since it did not involve Delta Sigma Theta Sorority Inc. I can't help but wonder how this happened.

Case in point, MAKE SURE you know what you want to be before BROADCASTING it all over the place. You may THINK you want to join Org, A, but realize later down the line that Org B is for you. Now there is nothing wrong with changing, your mind, however depending on how open you were with your first choice, they can be some consequences. People will start testing out your motives. They may think you want to be Greek.....Just because......

Hope you're having a GREAT DAY!

V

Anxiously, Awaiting.....


So you are interested in joining a Black Greek Letter Organization, and you want the members to know you. To like you. To know that you exist. There are certain ways you can accomplish this without being pushing, and annoying. I will never forget when I first joined Delta Sigma Theta Sorority Inc. I was a neo, fresh off the sands, and I remember feeling GOOD! The organization that seemed so far within my reach, and NOW I am a proud member. I had just returned from summer break, and looking forward to a brand new school year. I think I mentioned before that my school's tradition was we could NOT buy any Greek Paraphernalia until we had our Neophyte Show (Which was not until that FOLLOWING FEB). Thankfully I had some wonderful friends who purchased me some cute stuff until then.

At any rate, I was just elected to be the president of my chapter, and I was ready to get to work. Although I expected to be known on campus (I wasn't before, but now that I was a brand new member AND the president, EVERYONE knew who I was). What I wasn't expecting was the pushiness of some of the females on campus. Some were pushier than others, but I remember this ONE girl who stood out. She would write notes and stick them in our mailbox. She would call me all the time, be standing outside of my classes when the class was over. It as a bit much. At first I just took it as she was VERY interested in joining and wanted to get to know me. But after a while, I became a bit concerned. This was especially scary when she asked me what I wanted as a Neophyte gift. I thanked her but told her it was not necessary to buy me anything. (I BARELY knew this chick, and I was NOT trying to get into trouble by accepting "gifts" from her. I mean, what if she tried out for membership and didn't get it? She could say that I PROMISED her a spot on the next line if she bought me gifts. No sir, I was not going to take that chance.

Case in point- Look, I get it! You want to be a member of XYZ SOooooooo BAD! You envision yourself wearing the letters, strolling/strutting at parties, performing community service, having brand new sisters/brothers, etc. I understand, I have been there. But there is a way to do things. You NEVER want to come off as "stalkerish" That's NOT a good look, and will NOT get you in. Let your work shine for itself. Allow the members to get to know you FROM your work, your leadership, your dedication, your grades, your community service, etc.

The Funny thing is, I was watching the Judge Mathis show on yesterday while cleaning my house (since we had the day off for Veteran's Day, btw thank you Veterans for your service) and one particular episode caught my eye. There were these two ladies that was suing each other. They met when one of them wanted to pledge the other's sorority. Although the one that was "pledging" ended up dropping line, what stood out to me was the one that was already IN the sorority stated that the girl who was looking to join was trying to "buy her way into the sorority." This brought back SO many memories of when I was in college, hence why I decided to write this post.

There is nothing wrong with trying to get to know your "future sorors/frat" but there is a way to do it.


I hope this all makes sense!

Have a WONDERFUL week and I promise to blog more often....Also, I just started a fashion blog as well. I LIVE for fashion, so if you are interested, please follow me there as well. I will post my outfits for the day (OOTD), cheap fines, Thrift store finds (I LOVE going thrifting, you find some gems when thrifting), etc.  My blog is Amore4fashion. I hope you join me over there! My hubby is going to join me in this adventure and take pictures of me wearing some of my finds.

Ciao For Now

V

Sunday, November 9, 2014

What do you mean I have to WORK???????




Joining any organization (Greek or Non-Greek) requires dedication, commitment, and HARD WORK! I say this because some people join due to the org being popular on campus, winning step shows, gaining new friendships, and an extra line on their resume, and many other reasons. I am a member of several organizations, and I managing them all takes a lot of hard work. Attending meetings, programs, being on several committees, and performing service for them takes a lot of time, but I love it! There are so many people out there that join Greek Organizations for the WRONG REASONS. Before making a commitment to join ANY organization, stop and think about your reasons. Are you willing to dedicate your time to join a committee? Attend community service events early in the morning? Attend monthly meetings? Fight for a cause? Save money for dues?

As I stated in a previous post, membership in BLGOs takes a lot of time, commitment, and MONEY!
It's mind blowing when prospective members are willing to save money to join these prestigious organizations, but will complain in a heartbeat when it's time to pay your annual membership dues. Now I understand that times are hard,  and, of course, you need to pay for your necessary needs (rent/mortgage, food, tuition, etc.) HOWEVER, I have seen many of my sorority sisters, make sacrifices to save money to pay for their membership dues.

This time of year is exciting for most people because Rush/Information flyers are going up and prospective members are hoping to receive an invitation to join. So before you sign your name on the dotted line.....THINK.....What are your real motives of becoming a member?

Monday, October 13, 2014

I'm BACK!!!!!






It's been a long time since I last blogged about Black Greek Life. So many things have changed in my life. I have a new job, changed my focused on school, (I am working on a Doctorate in Education with emphasis on Leadership), and I just became active in TWO other organizations that I pledged in college: Sigma Alpha Iota, and Alpha Phi Omega. I am also the Corresponding Secretary for my Delta Chapter. Now that things have settled down a bit, I am able to blog a little more. (Oh, and also for those that know me personally, I am also a little bit of a fashionista, so I am starting a fashion blog  if you are interested in following me on that, leave me a comment below). I LOVE shoes, and I have shoes GALLORE, (more I stopped counting after 125.

So it's fall semester, and I for those who are interested in pledging, this is the PERFECT opportunity for you to get your face AND name out there. As I stated in the past, the best way to do this is attending ALL Greek events if possible, becoming involved in other organizations. (Student Government, Black Student Union, Gospel Choir, etc.) When people find out you are interested in joining an organization, they will sometimes scrutinize your every move. How do you act on campus? Are you one of those females who like to get "turned up" at parties? Are you messy? How do you dance at Union Parties or parties off campus?  This will be taking into consideration when you are applying for membership. You want to treat applying for membership, as if you are applying for a job.

When I pledged Delta, over 14 years ago, we didn't have myspace, facebook, twitter, etc. I never had to worry about my postings, or tagged pictures coming back to haunt me. Case in point, you want to make sure you are cognoscente on what post on social media, or else it very well could come back to haunt you. This isn't just for pledging, but for your future as well. I personally have several social media accounts, and I would NEVER post my personal business out there for the world to see. I think its best that you don't either.


For those of you that are going through membership intake right now, CONGRATS, and I can't wait to see you on the other side. For those of you that aspiring to become Greek in the near future, GOOD LUCK TO YOU! I hope to post more on this blog now that I my life have slowed down a bit. I love the fact that we are on fall break right now, so this week I will blogging a little more, while working on school work.

Monday, May 5, 2014

What Does THAT mean????

Fridays at the school I teach at is considered "Casual Friday" for all teachers. On this particular day I decided to wear some Greek Paraphernalia. During my 3rd period class, three students were inquiring about the letters on my chest.

Student A: What does that mean Mrs. Love?

Me: I belong to a Greek Letter Organization

Student B: You're Greek? I thought you were Black

Student A: No dummy, she said an organization, my mom is one of those thingys

Me: Really?? Do you know which one?

Student A: The one that wears that ugly pink and yellow.

Me: You mean Pink and Greek??? (Laughing on the inside)

Student A: Yeah that's the one. Her and her sisters be screeching really loud!

Student C: Yeah my daddy is a DAWG, (starts hopping)

Student A: Well I'mma tell my moma I wanna be a member of YOUR organization Mrs. Love. I don't like my Mom's organization. They are so stuck up and snotty.

Me: Snotty? Don't you mean the word "snooty"

Student A: Yes, snooty.

Me: Well not ALL members are snooty Student A, so don't judge it just on that okay?

Student A: I don't care what you say, I wanna be one of ya'll. Ya'll cool and down to earth.

Me: Okay settle down class, let's get started on our concert, take out.............

Lesson For the Day : Children are always watching!


Saturday, January 11, 2014

Food in Seoul Korea/DST Sisterhood Conference


The Food in Korea was SO delicious, I decided to create a blog post JUST about the food. I can't wait to go back to Next Year.



We slept ALL day, so my girl was nice enough to run out to grab us some McDonalds. Now Grant it i will say that it taste NO WHERE NEAR the McDonalds that we are use to in the US, however it was good enough to eat since we didn't eat anything all day.

South Korean Money


CHEETOS SNACK








This place was SO good we went back TWICE








Friday, January 10, 2014

Seoul Korea/DST Farwest Sisterhood Conference



I had an amazing time with my beautiful sorors at the farwest region International Sisterhood Conference. I wasn't even considering going until my principal (also my soror) insisted that I go. So glad that she did. We had a great time connecting with sorors from all over. We wanted to make the best of our trip, so we decided to fly in a few days early. This was a great way to shop, and connect with the Natives for South Korea. Oh did I mention where it was???? My bad, we went to South Korea.

When we first arrived, we stayed in this quaint little establishment where you need a code to gain access. We had bunk beds which was different for the both of us. The last time I slept in a bunk bed was when I was in college. Nevertheless, we got in late, but we were still on US time so it seemed like morning to us. We dropped off our luggage, took a quick shower and headed out for a night of fun.


I felt as if I was back in College again,,,,but considering we would only be there to lay our heads, I was fine with it. Also, we would only be there for three nights. When the sisterhood conference starts, we would then  stay on the military base. We just decided to go a few days prior to the conference so we could have some "us time, and shopping time." Just like College, I took the top bunk.






We walked down the street and found this CUTE little restaurant. We took off our shoes at the door, and sat at this cute little tables to order food. There were other natives there, and they were so friendly they came by to join us. It was funny because we barely knew how to speak Korean, and they were testing out their broken English on us. They came over to break bread with us...and we had a ton of fun!



This meal was DEE-LISH!!!!!!!















Monday, January 6, 2014

Letter of Recommendation: Who Should I ASK?????



So I know it's that time of year where a lot of prospective members are scrambling trying to get everything in order for them to pledge XYZ Sorority/Fraternity. As I stated before, each organization has their own process/procedure when applying for membership. Most orgs will ask you for a letter of recommendation from an active and financial member. Here are a few tips I can give you regarding this matter.

1. Ask someone you KNOW! This is SO important! They need to know who they are writing a letter to. Do you know them personally? More importantly do you know THEM personally? You want them to "brag" about you, and how can they brag if they don't' know you?

2. Are they active and more importantly FINANCIAL with the organizations? I am assuming if you asking them then  you have seen them participate in chapter events such as community service events, fundraising events, etc. Why is this important? Well several organizations require that its' prospective members get a letter of recommendation from a "dues paying" member. Are you trying to ask someone who haven't been active for a while? Chances are, if they have not be active with a chapter, they are not financial. This will deem your application of being invalid.

3. Always have an A, B, AND C plan as to someone writing your LOR. (Letter of Recommendation). I say this because you want to make sure you can get in touch with the person, prepare yourself for possibly getting  a "no", or the you may find out that the ONLY person you relied on is not financial. When I joined what feels like many moons ago, I had ONE person in mind. My ex-boyfriend's sister. I spoke to her on the phone a couple of times, and when the time came, she wasn't able to write me a letter of recommendation. Well let me clarify, by stating when the time came, I meant when I felt COMFORTABLE asking her, it wasn't like I needed it for an upcoming rush or anything like that. Then I met and grew close to another member at my job while we both were working as sales associates at Marshall Fields. It was funny because I ended up transferring to the school she pledged at. Two years later when I asked for an LOR, I found out she was inactive. DANG! So disappointed, but THANKFULLY I had a C plan. And this Soror was more than willing to write me a letter of recommendation. I found out many yrs. later that she NEVERS write a letter of recommendation for ANYONE, so the fact thats he wrote me one tells me that I made quite an impression on her.

As for me???? I have been asked 25 times to write a LOR, and how many have I written? 1….YUP JUST ONE! I am very picky on who I choose to write a letter to. I have to really know you to write you a letter, and I just don't be writing letters all willy nilly.

3. The moment  you find out you want to join XYZ organization, find out who you would like to write your letter of recommendation. This is important and will allow you figure out if they fit number 2 and if not, hopefully you can talk to them openly about any suggestions that they may have as to who could write you a letter.

4. GIVE the recommender plenty of time to write your letter. Asking at the last min might result in delays of the chapter receiving your letter, or the person saying they don't have time, or just a point-blank NO!

These are the top FOUR I would suggest you follow when asking for a LOR.

Wishing ALL the prospects for Spring 2014 all the best! 

Saturday, January 4, 2014

HAPPY 2014!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Congrats to ALL of you who crossed over into Greek Land Fall Semester. I have received emails from followers who are now my sorors, Zetas, AKAs, Iotas, Kappas, and Alphas.

It's 2014, which means a HUGE celebration for Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity Inc. As I stated in my first post "Journey to Greekland" I have a ton of relatives in the "Blue and White" family.  I am truly excited for them, and I can't wait to see my Facebook "blow up" with a ton of posts from my family and friends of Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity Inc.  It just seems like on yesterday when my sorors and I were blowing up everyone's newsfeed on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter with posts about us turning 100.

I have received a ton of requests from neos if I can create a few posts about the "Life of Being a Neo" If you want to see more posts about this,,,, please replied to this post. Also, let me know what you would like to know.