Wednesday, November 12, 2014
So I even though I have addressed this in my blog already, I have noticed that I am still receiving questions surrounding this topic.
I was interested in joining Organization "A". I love "A" and everything they stand for. I had my heart set on pledging "A" until I went to school this fall. I found out A was not on campus. My heart was broken. I wanted to spend my year getting to know the members of A., So I decided to see if there was an alumnae chapter in the area. To my surprise, there was an active chapter in the area. I attended all of their events; I was able to get to know the members of the chapter, and connect with them. It was at the point where they new my name if they saw me at the neighborhood grocery store, or mall. I felt good about my decision of getting to know them.
I was told that they would not be having intake no time soon since they are on a moratorium. My heart was broken. Why did this have to happen this year of all years? Although I continued to support the alumnae events, I knew that it would not happen for me this year. My roommate, however, was interesting in joining org B. She asked me to accompanied her to a few events, and I decided to support her. In doing so, my eyes have opened to another org. I liked this ladies, and they seemed very nice. Now I am confused. What should I do? Organization A, you have to be a sophomore to join, but Organization B, you only have to be a second-semester freshman. Should I give Organization B a chance? Thanks!
My ex-boyfriend wanted to be an Alpha. He wanted to be one BAD! I will NEVER forget the time we both went over his cousin's crib, (Who was ALSO an Alpha) and he gave him the Alpha History book for him to read and study to prepare him for pledging. (I was MAD jealous, why couldn't anyone give me the Delta History Book???) Then his BEST FRIEND pledge Omega and he were actually considering joining Omega Psi Phi. This was I believe the only argument that we had at this point. You want to join WHAT???? First off, as much as I love the bruhs. (A term that is used for Q's ONLY in the Midwest until I learned later that Men in fraternities in the South use this......) I was dumbfounded. I told him he only wanted to be a Q because his best friend just pledged Omega Psi Phi. I said he needed to STICK with his original choice. We got into a quarrel one evening and during one of our double dates with my best friend and her boyfriend at the time, I asked her for her advice. She sided with me of course. She said you couldn't pull any stunt like that at my school, (She went to Howard)
I am not sure if he ever became a member of Omega Psi Phi or if he went back to his original plan and became a member of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity Inc, or just decided not to pledge anything at all. When I told my husband this story, he laughed and said that the poor boy was probably confused. Naw, I doubt he was confused, because all we use to talk about was me becoming a Delta, and him becoming an Alpha. He went on to say that he hoped he doesn't pledge his frat, or ANY frat for that matter until he made up his mind. He stated that We don't need people joining the fraternity if they weren't sure. He went on say that I just wanted him to become an Alpha because I love me some Alpha Men. LOL! He's probably RIGHT!
Believe it or not, this happens QUITE OFTEN. I have seen it happen to some of my friends, associates, etc. In reading this young lady's post, it appears that she is trying to find to an organization to belong to. As I stated before, I have wanted to be a Delta since I was 14 years old. Never ONCE did I stray from that. Now, I am not saying that it's wrong to change your mind; it's not! My Aunt is a PROUD member of Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority Inc, and I have told you all that I have a family FULL of Zetas. One of my cousins pledged Zeta because it was the "thing to do " in my family. Right when it was time to cross, she dropped. She couldn't do it. She knew that AKA was in her heart, and if she singed her name on the dotted line, it would be the end of her journey. She would NEVER be considered for joining the sorority of her dreams. So the night she was supposed to cross, she dropped a line. Nevertheless, our family members were not happy about her decision. (This was in '84 or 85 I believe)
At any rate, 20 years later, she joined the sorority of her dreams. She had NO regrets and was thankful that she decided to drop a line. Look, I have said this so many times in my blog, membership in this organization is a LIFETIME! You do not want to end up pledging one fraternity/or sorority while secretly wishing you joined the one you wanted to be a member of.
These days, I am have seen my share of "Switching" that is AMAZING TO ME! You pledge one sorority or fraternity in COLLEGE, and then years later, on the other end of the globe, you pledge a DIFFERENT sorority or fraternity at the alumni/alumnae ..... I have asked myself TONS of questions on how this is possible? What happens when you go back to your school? Are you respected by your FIRST choice? What about your line brothers/sisters? Do you just "throw away" those memories you had when you crossed with your LS/Lbs? Do you get rid of your pictures? What about the images that other people have of you? What if they decide to TAG you on Facebook? Or feature YOU as a Throwback Thursday on Facebook/Twitter, and they are you are.... throwing up your fraternities/sorority hand sign, How do they feel about that decision? And the questions goes on....and on...and on...... Sure you may THINK that they respect you,, but trust me...they are talking about you like a DAWG behind your back. This is ESPECIALLY the case if the org you decided to pledge later one HAD an ACTIVE chapter when you were in school and didn't pledge that chapter for WHATEVER REASON. Although this is none of my business since it did not involve Delta Sigma Theta Sorority Inc. I can't help but wonder how this happened.
Case in point, MAKE SURE you know what you want to be before BROADCASTING it all over the place. You may THINK you want to join Org, A, but realize later down the line that Org B is for you. Now there is nothing wrong with changing, your mind, however depending on how open you were with your first choice, they can be some consequences. People will start testing out your motives. They may think you want to be Greek.....Just because......
Hope you're having a GREAT DAY!