Sunday, January 17, 2016

J13 VS. J15 – HOW TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN AKAS AND DELTAS

I came across this article this weekend, and I found it hilarious! I have a ton of AKA
 friends and they also found it funny as well. ENJOY!!!! 




J13 VS. J15 – HOW TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN AKAS 
AND DELTAS


While no group of people is a monolith, and we do not wish to stereotype the hundreds of thousands of women in these organizations, we thought we would give you a primer on how to distinguish your friends who pledged…
Not only is it the launch day of NegusWhoRead, but two of the most illustrious and noted organizations in the world also celebrate more than one hundred years of service this week.
Although every human being is unique, there are distinct characteristics that many members of sororities or fraternities share among the members of their respective organizations. 
While no group of people is a monolith, and we do not wish to stereotype the hundreds
 of thousands of women in these organizations, we thought we would give you a primer 
on how to distinguish your friends who pledged Alpha Kappa Alpha from those who are sisters of Delta Sigma Theta.
  1. AKAs always remind you that they were first.Deltas always remind you that most great creations had a first draft.
  2. The Delta was the president of the Black Student Council, Pan-Hell, the Student Government Association and The Sisterhood of Feminists.The AKA was on the dance team, the school welcoming committee, and planned the annual fashion show for the Black Student Council, Pan-Hell and the Student Government Association. When she approached the Sisterhood of Feminists about a fashion show fundraiser, they refused to take part in an activity that objectifies women’s bodies, even though they all walked the runway in the Black Student Council’s fashion show.
  3. Both went natural, but:
    The AKA gets hers blown out and straightened every week, although for special occasions she will get a shoulder-length sew-in, but only if the hairdresser 
    uses Remy #9 hair.
  4. The Delta grew dreadlocks.
  5. The AKA dated the star of the Basketball team.
    The Delta tutored the star of the Basketball team — until she got tired of him trying to holla at her during every study session–even though she kept reminding him that his AKA girlfriend was her bestie.
  6. When when you go out for drinks, the AKA will order a fruity drink with so much sugar so she can’t taste the alcohol.
  7. The Delta will be taking shots.
  8. The AKA has a set of nice earrings with emeralds and pink diamonds that perfectly match an embroidered AKA sweater she bought at nationals.The Delta has 2,934 t-shirts, 563 hoodies, and 114 red dresses that match her fortitude necklace, her elephant charm bracelet, pyramid ring, DST watch and Delta shoulder tattoo…But she needs some more paraphernalia.
  9. Even when there are no other AKAs present in the room, an AKA will still represent with a “skee-wee” if called upon.
    There is no such thing as one Delta in a room.
  10. If you date a Delta, you will always be a half hour late because you had to wait for her to get ready so she can look perfect.
    If you date an AKA, you will always be a half hour late because you have to change clothes. You know she’s not going anywhere with you looking like that.
  11. AKA’s pronounce it “soar-roarrr.”Deltas pronounce it “saw-rah”
  12. Your sweet third-grade teacher was an AKA who always made you feel smart, beautiful and special… Except for that one time you acted up in class and she sent you to the principal’s office and the principal called your mama. When your mama came to the school you could swear that sweet lady was about to cry.That principal was a Delta.
  13. The AKA is a third generation legacy. Her mom was an AKA. Her grandmother was an AKA. Her great grandmother was an AKA.The Delta is a third generation legacy. Her mom was gonna be a Delta but she didn’t have the grades. Her grandmother was gonna be a Delta but she didn’t go to college. She doesn’t even know if her great grandmother wanted to be in a sorority. All she knows is that during her freshman year in college, just before her great-nana died, she whispered in her ear:“Don’t you pledge no damn AKA.”
  14. AKAs collect frogs.
    Deltas don’t actually collect elephants. It’s just that whenever a Delta has a birthday, anniversary, graduation or her auntie goes to a flea market — everyone buys her an elephant.

So there you have it. Take this information with a grain of salt, and AS A JOKE. 

Happy 108th Birthday to the women of Alpha Kappa Alpha.
And a happy 103 years of sisterhood and service to the women of Delta Sigma Theta.
Roo.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Michael Harriot is a renowned spoken word poet, the host of The Black One podcast and the editor-in-chief of NegusWhoRead. He is perpetually just getting warmed up because he has no chill.

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