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Thursday, February 18, 2010

Fraternity Sweethearts....Will this help my chances of getting picked???



Alpha Angels/Sweethearts, Sigma Doves, Que Essence/Pearls, Kappa Diamonds/Sweethearts,... etc.... Depending on your college, many fraternities have what are known as "sweetheart" organizations. Prior to a few years ago, these organizations were maintained by the fraternity. Now they have all became "incorporated" and have distant themselves from fraternities all together. Back when I was in school, many girls thought that if they wanted to be Deltas, then they had a better chance by pledging/joining "Que Essence/Pearls. Let me stress that joining these auxiliary groups will NOT put you a step closer in becoming a member of the sorority of your choice. On the contrary in SOME cases it may hurt you. There are some cases where girls just want to join these sweetheart groups simply because of the love they have for a particular fraternity. For the most part however, I have seen so many cases where women feel that they NEED to join these auxiliary groups in order to become a member of its "sister" (and I use this term loosely since the only TRUE brother and sister Greek Organization is Phi Beta Sigma and Zeta Phi Beta)

How do I feel about these orgs? Well considering my stance of being an Alpha Sweetheart, I think joining them can be a great thing as long as you are doing it for the RIGHT reasons! For some like myself it means helping the fraternity out by volunteering your services (helping run programs, community service, helping out with voter registrations drives, etc..) But as I stated before it REALLY depends on your college campus. I have seen it where the Sigma Doves and the Zetas HATED each other. When the Sigma Carnations (sweethearts) crossed over, the Sigma gave them jackets, with line names, numbers and they hung out with the Sigmas all the time. Even at Greek parties the Sigma sweethearts would stroll with the Sigmas. This would cause so much confusion because people would sometimes confuse the sweethearts for Zetas. As you can imagine the Zetas were not happy about this at all.

So here is some advice, before joining a sweetheart organization, do some research. If you find you really want to be a member of Zeta Phi Beta, and they despise the Sigma Sweethearts, then maybe it's not a good idea to join the sweetheart organization. Petty I know, but remember we ARE women and women CAN BE petty! I recall at one particular school where there was a huge conflict between the Deltas and the Que Sweethearts!

Sweethearts can also include MEN auxiliary groups as well. There are MIAKAs, Delta Gents, Rhomeos, etc....Joining these groups will NOT guarantee you a spot in the fraternity of your choice as well.

Remember, although joining an auxiliary group can be fun and exciting for college, it's not worth sacrificing your desire in joining a Sorority or Fraternity if there is a conflict with the sorority of your choice.

28 comments:

  1. I am not a member of a Fraternity but I am a sweetheart to the Zetas and we are known as Zeta Knights, but the problem we have coming from the swetheart point of view is that most Fraternities assume that you are homosexual because you are the sweetheart to a sorority and granted some members may be but do not assume that all members are. For many members its not about trying to get into a Fraternity or Sorority thats why we became sweethearts for the most part its about that respective organization that welcomed us and helped us our freshman year in college and we came to love and respect them as big sisters and big brothers and they asked us to be sweethearts and without hesitation we accepted.

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  2. I have a question. I was in the Miss Omega Psi Phi pageant the other day at my university, and I won one of the titles. I don't want to join their sister organization because I've always had another sorority in mind. Have I done the wrong thing by participating in this pageant or maybe boosted my chances (because members of my desired org helped put it on)? I really do love the bruhz. They're nice guys. Does this put me in the category of a sweetheart???

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  3. ^^ I am a brother of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity, INC. and you don't fall under the category of a "sweetheart" you should move forward with your aspirations to join your sorority of choice.

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  4. I am a brother of Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity,Inc., and I was a Zeta Knight interest. Before I looked at fraternities, I had only Zetas on my campus. I fell in love with Zetas and everything that they stand for, which made me want to be a Zeta Knight. Maybe because I understand the whole concept of auxiliary groups,that I don't look at the male sweethearts like that. I think people only have that perspective because all the recent pictures shows Zeta Knights as feminine. The MIAKA's were always labeled as gay because of that youtube video a while back.

    In my opinion, I never looked at Zeta Knights like that, only MIAKA's. But I've seen SGRhomeos and I wouldn't put that in that same category. We are all just men with no labels but what we give ourselves.

    I still got love for Z Knights!


    Just giving feedback.

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    1. Hey Wassup! I am a MIAKA! BUT!!! We did not do ANY of that crap that is on You-Tube. We pledged a little-it wasn't 'krazy'. We just helped the sisters with their on and off campus projects.(Lifting heavy equipment and bouncing at parties, etc.)A lot of my line-brothers(if you will)were headed towards Alpha Phi Alpha. We just wanted to help the fine sisters of Alpha Kappa Alpha out!These ladies helped me out in my freshman year and this was a way of giving back my service to them.

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  5. When I was in college I was a Sigma Sweetheart, who crossed over to a Sigma Star. I joined the Sigma auxillary group because of the love I had, and have still to this day, for Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity. I love what they stand for, their community outreach efforts, and how awesome they can step. The Sigmas were good to us sweethearts and I will be forever grateful.

    At my college us sweehearts had much love and respect for the Zetas, and they showed us love back in return. To this day we are all one big blue/white family. It is such an uplifting feeling to experience. And there were some Sigma sweethearts who pledged Zeta, as well as other sororities, and we are still a greek family.

    I agree that if you decide to become a fraternity sweetheart, do it for the fraternity. If they chose you to represent them as one of their sweethearts, then they deserve that much respect.

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  6. I am a Iota Sweetheart as everyone knows we are the only national recognized auxiliary group out there everything else doesn't exist. In my opinion, why join anything were your opinion doesn't even matter.

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  7. my boyfriends a sigma does that make me a sigma dove?

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    1. No, you can only become a Dove if you go through the process on a college campus with legal Sigmas.
      But auxiliaries are illegal anyway

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  8. im a Kappa Sweetheart and as much as i would like to disagree with this article, i cant. It is VERY much truth that when u pledge to be a sweetheart (in most schools) it is VERY hard to join a sorority. Not only are we not very much appreciated by the "bros" but Kappa Sweets have one of the WORST reputations for sleeping with the bros to get in. Though this is not truth it is something that most Kappa Sweethearts have to deal with when at an event. The divine nine sororities DESPISE the kappa sweethearts because we stroll with the best looking fraternity, thus jealousy happens. So, before u pledge an underground organization, really THINK! If you would want to go FURTHER into an actual fraternity/sorority DO NOT pledge an auxiliary group (depending on where you are). Do your research on these groups first thru word of mouth and on the internet because MOST of the time these "sweetheart" groups are a waste of time, money, and life.

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    1. I completely agree with my sis. It is all about the chapter and the process. Not all stereotypes are true, but some might be depending upon these things. As a Kappa Diamond, I did not have to deal with any of these as there is a very small NPHC population on my campus and I joined because some of my best friends are nupes, but I have heard stories about girls elsewhere that have had to deal with the negative back lash from joining an auxiliary group.

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    2. I agree as well, It wasnt the fact that the sororities hated the auxillaries ( I did it many years ago) but while I was doing Kappa Sweetheart, I should have focusing on getting into the sorority, now I've graduated years ago and still have not had the chance to join.

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    3. My sentiments exactly Anonymous 8/20 and 8/14 below.

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    4. hey all I am kki (kappa sweetheart). I am still a NEO and I love my organization and KAPPA ALPHA PSI to the fullest. And I agree that it depends on the campus you are pledging. I go to an HBCU and everyone knows who and what I am. I have heard that it may be hard for me join a nphc sorority but I know personally that all of my big sisters that have wanted to join weren't turned down. So do what makes you smile and go for what you want.
      #task

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  9. I was thinking about joining the Iota Sweethearts, but I have a lot of love for the Iotas, as well as the Ques, obviously I can't do both; but my main concern was if you join a sorority, which I've done my research on and want to join, first is it okay to join an auxiliary group.
    i.e. if i was -.-.- could i then join Que Pearls or be an Iota sweetheart. Or if I did a pageant for the Ques became Ms. Omega, joined an org, and be an Iota Sweetheart.
    it's a lot maybe dumb, but I was wondering before I go into my 2nd year knowing that some sororities have suggested I learn more, I'm guessing that means they are interested in me pledging with them.

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  10. I am a Que E from way back. We really had a ball during those old days with the bruhs, did some good work. The bruhs treated us well. The Deltas acknowledged themselves as the Que's sisters at that time, but seemed to be indifferent towards us. They were cool, we respected them, but there was certainly no big rivalry. I did not join the Que E's just to be closer to becoming a Delta, but there were times that I did think that for alot of girls in the sweetheart organizations on campus, that was their reason for joining. (And we had all of the black fraternities, except Iotas on the campus). Truth be told, we had Que E's in our chapter who became Deltas, AKA's and Zetas. (Except my line, no one joined a thing). I had my eye on joining a sorority later in my college career, but I transferred schools and my focus was just on the studies. However, had I to do it all again, I would not have joined an auxiliary. I would have developed more of a relationship with the ladies of the sorority that I had been interested in and hopefully pledged it. They do really great things in the community. As a final note, it's kind of a shame that none of my fellow Que E's from my old campus, acknowledge being an "E" with the fervor we used to back then. Sororities/Fraternities proudly wear their paraphenalia life long. I don't note that the members of sweetheart organizations display their pride life long (and some of us intitated pretty hard for it). Good luck to those who decide to join.

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  11. I am a proud member of LOO... I didnt join to get closer to a sorority, to fuck the bruhz, or bc i felt like i owed them something. I did it out of pure love for the frat and omega sweethearts...I fell in love with what they stood for, what they did, the respect i got... They felt like family and still do... I love being a LOO. QuuuueSweeeet!!!

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  12. Hello, i just have a few questions. I am a non-greek and My boyfriend is a brother of Kappa Alpha Psi and people have told me that if i am dating a NUPE that i am his Kappa Sweetheart and if i was to marry him (Which I am) I will be a Kappa Silhouette. I'm still learning about greek life and i hope i don't offend anyone with my question. I just need to know so i won't say anything wrong.

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  13. If you marry a Kappa Alpha Psi Member you can become a Silhouette.

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  14. I am reading a lot of these post and I am surprised at some of the responses. I was a Sigma Sweetheart back in the day when such organizations existed. It was an honor to be selected, and you had to be selected and to work with the brothers. They treated us well and took care of family. I also met many of the Zetas on campus and never felt any ill will from them. We all got along great and most of the my sweetheart sisters became Zetas including myself. Phi Beta sigma and Zeta Phi Beta are the only constitutionally bound orgs and their auxillaries at that time were never left out. I enjoyed being a sweetheart then and I will always be a sweetheart since my husband is a Sigma and I love, love ,love being a member of Zeta Phi Beta Sorority Inc. I never regretted my choices because when you join any group it must be for the right reasons...

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    1. That's true. However, you are a Zeta now. Even though you are a sweetheart in the eyes of your spouse, and you were a Sigma Sweetheart years ago, do not wear shirts that say Sigma Sweetheart or have a placard on your car or in your home that says Sigma Sweetheart? That's what makes me wonder if there's any point in joining a sweetheart organization. Especially nowadays. Much respect, though.

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  15. Oh My! Well im a Sigma Sweetheart from the Beta chapter and I do agree with some of the things in the article, I have to say we got along with the Zetas very well. now there might be some new things going on, but last time I checked when I went down for a Ceremony everything was fine. and us as Sweethearts Stress to the young ladies tht joining our Org. doesn't Promise you a spot in any Greek org. We do let them know tht wht ever they decide to do use what we have instilled at a learning tool. true enough I skipped the Greek process and Became a Woman of the Light (O.E.S) I still keeping contact and active in both Org. *But simply do wht you want to do it is your life. just enjoy it!!*

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  16. I was a Sigma Dove many many moons ago at Frostburg State University in MD. We only had one active Zeta at the campus and we all got along. I went in to become a Delta because I loved what they stood for. I am no longer an active Delta, but I would not be who I am today if it were not for both of those experiences.

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  17. Wondering if going through the process of being a Nupe had any bearing on me becoming a Prince Hall Freemason...

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