When is a good time to pledge??? (Grad)

I blogged about this topic at the undergrad level a few years ago. Although I meant to blog about my thoughts on when is a good time to pledge at the graduate level, it totally slipped my mind, so here we go!

So, you tried to join the organization of your dreams, but you couldn't due to circumstances beyond your control. This can be due to the org was suspended or on probation on your campus, the National Organization was going through a moratorium, you tried several times but not selected for whatever reason, or you just never thought about pledging until.....well....now!

So when is a good time to start perusing the organization of your desire? NOW!  Joining an Alumni/Alumnae Chapter is MUCH different than trying to join an undergrad chapter. It is easier to get to know the members on a college campus than members from a graduate chapter. Through taking classes together, being members of other org on campus, being roommates, neighborhoods, staying in the same dormitory, etc. Trying to connect alumnae/alumni members has its challenges because the only opportunity you may have to connect with members is at events, at your job if you work together, or at church.

I have mentioned in one of my previous posts that my best friend FINALLY became a member Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority Inc-her dream sorority. It was a challenge for her for many years. Trying to get to know the members of the chapter, making that particular connection with members, etc. After she finally made a few connections with members, attended their events, and she allowed them to get to know her it made her journey so much easier.

So when is a goo time to pledge at the alumnae/alumni level? Well, there are a few questions you need to ask yourself.

1. Why do you want to become a member?
   Is it a longing that you have had for years and years but did not have the opportunity?
  Were you not financially stable to make that commitment? (It is expensive)
  Were you focused more on starting your career, and now that you have started your career you fell that you are ready?
  Is it something you never thought about before, but now for some reason you have this longing in your heart and finally make that step?

Or maybe it can be something entirely different that I didn't even mention. I always tell prospective members to figure out why they want to pledge before making that step. Evaluate and re-evaluate your reasons before taking that leap.

2. Do you realize how EXPENSIVE it is to become a member and to REMAIN a member? Membership in these organizations costs money.....a lot of money. I am not going to sugar coat it; I will just tell it like it is. The cost of membership varies from organization to organization, but at the end of the day, it cost money. Also please understand that membership does not stop AFTER you pay your initiation fee. Once you become a member, there are yearly dues that you must pay, some events that you must support financially and so on. If you feel you are not at a point to support the org of your choice, then wait. Wait until you are financially in a position to support the organization.

3. Are you still holding on to those college dreams/fantasies? Just......STOP...and DON'T!  It doesn't matter if you are 21-61-or 91, If you are seeking membership at the graduate level, then you are a COLLEGE GRADUATE! Now I am not saying that you can not go back to your alma mater to represent your organization during homecoming, but at the end of the day, you are NOT a member of that college chapter. I have seen this so SOOOO many occasions. Folks were trying to pledge XYZ org didn't get either picked, or the chapter was suspended, so they join as SOON as they graduate. Nothing wrong with that, except some of these folks, go BACK to their alma mater and try to "act as if" they are from that chapter. Now don't get me wrong, your membership is no better than the membership of those who pledged at your alma mater, HOWEVER doesn't fake the funk as if you were a part of that chapter. This may sound crazy, but BELIEVE ME, I have seen it happen!

4. You saw XYZ doing amazing things in the community, and you want to attach your name to that particular organization. Nothing wrong with that.

5. You are a legacy, you want to make your mom/grandmother, father/grandfather proud!

6. It's on your bucket list and something you want to cross off your list.

Now there may be many other reasons for why you wish to join at the grad level, but I guess the main point I want to get across is you need to make sure you understand your reasoning of why you want to join.

One you realize that you want to join, you have your finances in order, then what's next???

Making your interests known is a GREAT start. Now I don't mean that you have to walk up to a member and say; Hello, my name is________ and I want to be a ________. That is not a good idea. What I mean however is attending different events, volunteering at community service events when possible. Striking up a conversation at a few of these events if the opportunity presents itself, etc.  For years, I have been saying how important it is for them to get to know you and for you to get to know them.  Remember that this is sisterhood/brotherhood that you are joining.

More Than Just Strolls, Calls, Hand Signs, and Colors

Today was a day I decided to reflect on the meaning of true sisterhood, and how I feel about being a member of one of the Top African-American Organization. As I rolled out of bed this morning, I geared myself up for the day's events. This included attending the first Delta Chapter meeting of the year, first Sigma Alpha Iota Chapter E-Board meeting of the year, and the first meeting of ASTA. When I decided to join a sorority, I had my heart set on wanting to join the ranks of an organization that was about Sisterhood, giving back to the community, and making a difference. Participating in Greek Step Shows, Going to Parties connecting with sorors from across the globe for me is just the "icing on the cake."

When I was a college freshman, watching the Greeks on the yard was a fantastic site to see.  The Alpha's stepping in their Black and Gold, AKA's looking pretty and meticulous in their pink and green, the Q's stepping harder than ANYONE with dog tags around their necks, and hopping carrying on to the infamous "Atomic Dog," and so on...... Although to some, this is their first introduction to Greek Life, that was not the case for me.

The reason for this post is to state that being a member of a BGLO is more than strolls/struts, calls, hand-signs, and colors. Most of these "traditions" are considered unofficial and did not come into existence until decades AFTER the organizations were founded. What prompts this post was after when I found myself speaking to a group of young collegiate who were stating their reasons why they wanted to join the various Greek organization. I have heard everything from, "they are the best steppers on campus, they get big "play" (I didn't even know they still use this word) at parties. They go on to say other Greek Orgs on campus will notice them.  They want to be a part of the pretty girls; they seem so cool and down to earth, etc. Never once did I hear, I want to join because they have the highest GPA on campus, they won student organization of the year, love the community service projects that they are currently involved in, etc. I find this funny because it never fails, when it comes down to the interview process, their answers change.

If you are joining at the collegiate level, I get it! Trust Me! You are getting admired on campus by your peers, standing out in a crowd because of those letters.  But being a member of a Black Greek Letter Org is more than just the college experience. What is life like after you graduate? For the first few years, you may find yourself going back to your school to connect with people that are still there — your prophytes that pledged you, or your neos that you pledged. You want to keep it cute at your school's step shows, homecoming, reunions, etc.  Hey, I get it! I have been there. Or you might find yourself NOT going back for several years because you are trying to secure a job, career, and start your adult life. Student loans are knocking HARD at your door six months after you graduated, so you are trying to make sure you have a job to make that first of many payments. Some members of BGLOs continue to serve in their organizations, and some take a break for financial reasons. (As I have stated before, being a financial member in a BGLO can be pricey, no need to sugar coat it)!

Now can you have fun afterward?  Absolutely!

Sister, Sister Greek Episode

             

I came across this episode online, and it brought back SO MANY MEMORIES! I will never forget when it first aired. I was in college, and I had my VCR (YES VCR) set to tape all of the Sister, Sister episodes. I was staying in the same dormitory hall as my boyfriend (Now hubby) at the time, and since he didn't have a TV, I gave him my TV and VCR since I spent a lot of time in his room. I stayed on a floor above him, and my roommate had TV, and he was an RA (Residential Assistant) with a single room. My roommate had a TV, so I had no problem allowing him to use my TV and VCR.

At any rate Sister, Sister uses to come on Sundays on this particular night I went to a Sigma Alpha Iota Rush, so I didn't have time to watch the episode when it aired. The next Morning I came downstairs to my boyfriend's room to watch Sister, Sister, and I started to scream when I saw those BEAUTIFUL letters across the screen. Delta Sigma Theta. My poor husband almost fell out the bed (HE was still sleeping, and didn't realize I was in the room) from my screaming. I was like OMG, A Greek episode. You have no idea how many times I watched this episode and kept it on tape. I even went as far as taking the taps off the VCR tape to ensure that I wouldn't accidently erase the tape. According to my husband, I am SUCH as Greek-head. (He has been calling me that for YEARS)

I love this episode and want to share it with you! It brought back SO many https://youtu.be/M1F0lBnsnkE of me sitting on my hubby's bed back in college, grinning from ear to ear. I just KNEW that Tia and Tamarra were going to pledge a Greek letter org while they were at Pepperdine University. I guess I was wrong.         

If these are your reasons for joining a Greek Letter Organization.......Just... Don't

Part I

People have their agendas of why they join several organizations.  If these are one of the reasons why you want to join a Greek Letter Organization, then, just, Don't!

1. Joining ABC or XYZ Org will make me famous. NOT! Joining any organization will NOT make you popular, no matter HOW popular the group is on campus. Being popular should not be a reason for joining ANY org. Some people fall into the trap of choosing an org based on their popularity status on campus. I have said this in my previous posts, and I don't think I can say it enough. Just because a Greek org is popping on your campus, does not MEAN it's popping everywhere else in the US. You want to make sure you evaluate your reason of why you want to join.

2. Pink and Green, are my FAVORITE colors, so it is destined for me to become a member of Alpha Kappa Alpha.  Or I HATE the color Blue, so Zeta is entirely out! Now What Now????  Yes, I have heard this before. Although the colors were chosen for each org for a particular reason, this should NEVER be a determining factor on you joining or not joining a Greek letter org. My BEST friend is an AKA, and her favorite color is and ALWAYS have been RED! YES, RED!  Although I am a Delta, I have a lot of Pinks, Purple, Blue, Green, and Yellow in my wardrobe! Don't join any org based on their colors, that's just silly!

3. I will get some significant play from the fraternities members (or sorority members) if I become Greek. Ummm.....I know PLENTY of GREEKS that have dated and MARRIED their spouses who were NOT Greek. I don't understand why anyone would think they have to become Greek to get noticed by other Greeks. When I started to date my boo, he was not Greek. I was not Greek. Sure he wanted to become an Alpha. However, I fell in love with him because of who he WAS as a person.

4. I want to step, and everyone knows that XYZ is the BEST steppers on campus. *Crickets* Now what now????? It reminds me of an old episode of "A Different World" when Kim was pledging Whitley's organization, and when asked why they wanted to join, one of the pledgees answered, "Cause no one Steps like the......" Joining ANY organization should not be based on how the org steps on campus, or how many step-shows they have won in the past. Now for those that know me personally, knows that I LOVE to step! I mean LOVE, LOVE, LOOOOOVEEE to step, however, to step never even crossed my mind when I decided I wanted to join my Org. It wasn't until AFTER I joined that I realized my enjoyment of stepping on a stage. Stepping didn't become popular until the '80s and newsflash; these Greek Letter Orgs had existed waaaayyyy before stepping became famous. Nowadays you don't even have to join a Greek Letter Org to step. SEVERAL groups step. So if you want to step, enter one of them.

5. Joining XYZ will help me land a job or a career. Okay, although I must admit that having these connections will at times get you in the door, at the end of the day, YOU still have to prove yourself.

6. Your Dad, Grandfather, Cousin, and Uncle are Alphas. Or your Mom, Aunt, and best friend are Deltas. My next door neighbor is a Zeta Ummm Okay????? Just because you have a few people in your family that are in this organization, doesn't mean you need to pledge the same Greek Letter Org, or better yet pledge at all.  I have personally witnessed family members telling their loved ones that they NEED to join their org, or if they pledge anything, it must be their Org.  Case in point, don't join a Greek Letter Org so you can fit in at your family reunions, or do it because you feel it will bring you and your family closer together.


There are several other reasons on WHY YOU SHOULDN'T join a Greek Letter org that I will talk about in another post, but I felt that I should highlight a few reasons. Joining any organization requires time, money, and most important commitment! So before you decide to join, THINK...What are the real reasons why you want to join?

Hope you had a nice Labor Day Weekend!

Hello Out There!!!!!

Hey Everyone,

It seems like it's been forever since I have blogged, so I felt as if I should reach out to check on you guys. Things are going well on my end; I am just busy, busy, busy!!!!! I am enjoying my career as a teacher (I teach orchestra, chorus, musical theater, and steel pan). This is my second year teaching in a different school district, and although it is an entirely different demographic that I am used to, I LOVE IT! I LOVE my students, and more importantly I am blessed to be teaching only about five mins from my house. Don't get me wrong I miss my old students SO MUCH, and thankfully they still keep in contact with me. They will ALWAYS be my babies, and it's great that now and then I receive a text from them asking me how things are going on my end.

Okay, so NOW back to the reason I have decided to blog! I really miss blogging to my perspective Greek family! My sorority is about to start up again, and I am ready to serve as best as I can as a member. I am entering my second year as my chapter's corresponding secretary, and I love it! The only thing I hate is my current and past hectic schedule has prevented me from getting more involved, and I am hoping that it will change shortly.

So what's new with you all? I have received several comments from some of you about being nervous about entering college life as freshmen, and how you want to make a great first impression on campus and so on. I am praying that a lot of you have a great and successful school year. Just a few thoughts I want to put out there:

Your priority should be your academics. Yeah, I know I probably sound like your parent, but it's true. If you are an entering freshman, things can be a bit overwhelming for you especially if you are attending an institution away from home. Your first year is SO important regarding securing a good, solid GPA, so I have three words, DON'T! BLOW! IT!!!!! You can still have fun, and enjoy your freedom of being in college, but do not allow your academics to suffer.

2. Get involved! Scope out the Student's activities building (if you have one) and find out which activities you want to join. This can range from Student Government, Gospel Choir, Black Student Union/Organization, etc. It's best to start to get your name out there, so people know who you are.

3. Be careful on the company that you keep. You want to be mindful on who you are hanging out with on a daily basis.  Remember the saying "Birds of a feather??""" Very true. You might not

25/50 Year Celebration!!!!

Happy Sunday Readers!

Last week was a busy week for me. Other than my normal full-load school schedule, I was excited that my chapter was attending our annual Founders Day Celebration. Another local chapter in my area was hosting the event, and our guest speaker was our National President, Dr. Walker. I was an incredible event, and I love the feeling of being surrounded by my beloved sorority sisters.

The two best part of the weekend's event for me was the Dr. Walker's speech, and watching sorors receive recognition of being a part of the sisterhood for 25 and 50 years.  For some reason, as they walked up to the podium to receive their plaque, I became emotional. What an honor. What a joy. I can't wait until I can celebrate 25 years in being a member of one of the greatest organizations.

Age Ain't Nothing But a Number.....

Aaliyah was correct when she first came out with this hit. (Oh how I miss her so) Age ain't  not nothing but a number. I have received a ton of request from prospective members asking what is the "AGE LIMIT" of joining an a BGLO. Truth be told, there isn't an age limit.

UNDERGRAD- A friend of my older sister joined Alpha Kappa Alpha her sophomore year in college. Mind you she went to college at age 16, so when she became a member of AKA, she was only 17 years old. Some felt she was too young, but it's all a matter of opinion. On the flip side, I had stated before that when I joined my respected organization, one my ships (line sisters) was in her 30s. My point is, you are never too old, or too young to join an organization. Now there may be some challenges if you want to join being older at the undergrad level. For example, some people can't handle being around, people younger than them. Imagine joining a BGLO with a bunch of 18, 19, and 20-year-olds? And you are in well in your 30s? Some of the complaints you may hear going through your process may seem stupid, frivolous, and dumb. TO YOU THAT IS! Remember you were once their age. So breaking up with boyfriends, or having a fight with a roommate, or a parent may seem small to you, but it's EVERYTHING to them.  If you find out you can't deal with their growing problems, then maybe you should hold off joining an organization until graduate chapter.

People wanting to join at undergrad level that are in their late 20's 30's and 40's are becoming more and more common now, simply because people are going back to school in their later years. So don't allow your age to deter you from joining, as long as you have an understanding that the people you will be pledging with could be a decade or so younger than you. As long as that doesn't bother you, then you should be ok.

GRAD- I think the oldest person I have seen that pledge an alum chapter was a gentleman that was well in his 60's. So at this level, age doesn't matter.

I hope this answers your questions and puts your mind at ease.

Until Next Time,

CIAO!

 V